I have a confession to make. Today I could not face any update on the Covid-19 pandemic, could not face hearing of more infections, more deaths. I have other things on my mind today, family concerns closer to home and no way to give the hugs that are so badly needed. Today I’m feeling the full force of social distancing and it hurts. So I picked up my camera and I went for a walk, alone, as allowed for my one daily exercise in the fresh air.
Fighting back tears I felt the warm sun on my face, smelled the salty sea air, listened to the birds above the vastly reduced traffic noise, and looked around at the beautiful landscape where I am lucky enough to live. The canal path is wide enough to pass others while maintaining a safe distance between you, and everyone I met today was also being sensible and considerate.For an hour or so I walked and photographed, and afterwards I felt a bit better.
This difficult situation will not last forever, and what matters most is that we all do what we can to get through it as best we can… ❤
There’s a surreal feeling of suspense hanging over us all right now, ominous and omnipresent, an uncomfortable undercurrent of uncertainty rippling outward as we all face an effective lockdown from now until whenever it may be. There are too many questions and not enough answers. These are undoubtedly scary times, unprecedented times, and none of us can know how things will turn out once it’s all over…
The world feels like such an alien place right now. Schools are closed, all pubs and restaurants and gyms and social spaces are closed. Those shops that are still open have more staff than customers, except for supermarkets which are constantly rammed and desperately recruiting new staff. No-one shakes hands, no-one hugs, everyone tries to keep a safe distance away from everyone else. Staying at home and staying safe for the duration is the order of the day for the bulk of the population. Welcome to the new normal…
Coronavirus takes us to the brink
Of madness as we panic-buy in fear
Like animals we act on base instinct
Protect the family we hold so dear
Across the globe the virus does its worst
Infection spreads with total disregard
As all humanity feels sorely cursed
The death toll rises, hits whole countries hard
First plagues of locusts, now this pestilence
With biblical proportions swarms the land
Man’s arrogance, so selfish, so immense
Reduced to nought by nature’s sweeping hand
With no immunity, the human race
Must meet this deadly virus, face to face…
From fake news to foreign virus, with Europe as America’s fallguy in this global crisis – forget it, fuckwit, you’re way more than a day late and a dollar short with your sudden show of pseudo-statesmanship… That ship has long since sailed, you’ve well and truly missed the boat with this one, and the rest of the world watches and waits as your scuppered administration finally starts to sink.
‘Momentum equals mass times velocity’ – or ‘p=mv’ according to my physics formula from school. These days I don’t seem to have much momentum – plenty of mass still, but not so much velocity.
When I was younger, during my twenties, I was a working single mum bringing up my three kids as best I could, and life was physically busy, busy, busy all the time. I worked hard, and I played hard, burning my candle at both ends. And as a full time university student in my late thirties, my brain was actively busy, busy, busy soaking up all the information I needed to pass my degree.
In my forties I maintained keeping busy out of habit, but in my early fifties menopause messed with my momentum both physically and mentally. I slowed down, and somewhere along the line I lost my need for speed. My hurry flat-lined spectacularly along with my hormones, and after a period of adjustment I’m finally ok with that.
I’ve finally learned what Ernest Hemmingway meant when he said ‘Never mistake motion for action’. I still actively ‘do’ life, I just like to do it as much through being than doing these days, and my favourite kind of busy is ‘busy doing nothing’ every opportunity I have… 🙂
If only I could capture how it feels
Describe destructive passions as they rise
Record their tightening grip with strength so real
Write down in words my silent, strangled cries.
Such visceral sensations surge and fall
Emotion sickness, writhing hard and fast
Internally I cannot think at all
So overwhelmed by feelings, urgent, vast…
But then the raging storm inside runs still
And empty spirit, hollowed out, bereft
Of every sense and feeling, waits until
A germ of hope can heal whatever’s left.
For now with heavy heart and soulless sigh
Emotional oblivion creeps by…